Month: May 2010

  • Buying Time Just to Survive

    So, today while just in “the zone” as I call it, I realized something that I probably should have known a great time ago. This past week we had 3 Bombs go off in the middle of a Soccer match. The first one went on the field, the other two at the entrance(s), wounding 150+, killing 10+. You might have heard about it on the news, but if not then you were lucky. So we responded to it, we being the medics on site. I stayed back to man the TMC (Troop Medical Clinic), and make sure everything was set up. 

    My realization was this;

    I am not invincible.

    I know…everyone has to die someday, but is it not hard to think that something like that could possibly happen to you? It is a very harsh realization, almost like a knock-out punch, with you originally in denial about the punch actually hurting.

    What a wake up call.

    How long did it take you to realize that you were as fragile as they say?

  • Forgiving to be Forgiven

    So, life itself has me pondering again, mainly due to this song. I did not like this song at all until something lyrically sound stood out to me. I started the song over again and payed more attention to the meaning behind the words that were being spoken, and realized that this was actually a very good, journeying song. You can hear the hardship in his voice, in the way his emotions convey a reality that not too many of us know.

    So without further hesitation, I give you Manchester Orchestra’s I Can Barely Breathe:

    When the dark flood came
    we wrapped ourselves inside a dirty blanket
    Citing different opinions
    on whether we should move

    When the houses came
    they ate up everyone like they were fishes
    saying, “come on, come on
    its the end of the world”

    And then I saw your face
    You’re turning skin into a dirty secret
    I watched the beauties, watched the fire
    and the fire burn the beauty in their eyes

    When I took the blame
    we layed in ruins trying to quote your phrase
    we’re yelling, “someone’s got the answers,
    but I’d rather think there’s nothing to be found”

    If you knew I was dying would it change you?
    If you knew I was dying would it change?
    If you knew I was dying would it change you?
    If you knew I was dying would it change anything?

    So when you see me falling backwards down the wall that says I’m still alive,
    But don’t be cautious when I’m cautiously approaching on the other side
    Yeah, everybody has their reasons, that’s the reason we’re all gonna die

    Because if seeing is believing,
    then believe that we have lost our eyes

    ‘Cause when I fly solo, I fly so high
    When I fly solo, I fly so high
    When I fly solo, I fly so high
    When I fly solo, I fly so high, I fly so high
    Don’t touch me now.

    You will have to listen to the song to get the full emotional output. Tell me what you think it all implies.

  • Sooo…..Giddieness is apparently genetic.

    Anyone out there ever felt the need to just do something completely “not you”? Like, you are not known for doing out of whack things, but you caught yourself in the middle of doing something of that nature?

    Yeah I do that all the time.

    But does that mean that it actually isn’t something that I would not do? Does that mean that those “out of whack” moments are part of the very being that makes me?

    I dunno…you tell me.

    I mean, I climbed on top of a little cement bunker today with a satellite dish on top of it, just to jump down and scare my buddy.

    Fail.

    Well…not the jumping down part…but the scaring part was a complete failure. Especially after I nearly dove head first into a CHU, Containerized Housing Unit….yeah I live in a box right now…it’s Iraq get off me. So the scaring was replaced by laughter…and making people laugh is what I am good at as well……

    So was it a complete failure?